Carrying a gun

(from an email)

My old Grandpa said to me, ‘Son, there comes a time in every man’s life
when he stops bustin’ knuckles and starts bustin’ caps and *usually it’s
when he becomes too old to take an ass whoopin’.’*

I don’t carry a gun to kill people; I carry a gun to keep from  being
killed.

I don’t carry a gun to scare people; I carry a gun because sometimes this
World can be a scary place.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m paranoid; I carry a gun because  there are
real threats in the World.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m evil; I carry a gun because I have lived
long enough to see the evil in the World.

I don’t carry a gun because I hate the government; I carry a gun because I
understand the limitations of government.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m angry; I carry a gun so that I don’t have
to spend the rest of my life hating myself for failing to be prepared.

I don’t carry a gun because I want to shoot someone; I carry a gun because
I want to die at a ripe old age in my bed and not on a sidewalk somewhere
tomorrow afternoon.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m a cowboy; I carry a gun because, when I
die and go to Heaven, I want to be a cowboy.

I don’t carry a gun to make me feel like a man; I carry a gun because men
know how to take care of themselves and the ones they love.

I don’t carry a gun because I feel inadequate; I carry a gun because
unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate.

I don’t carry a gun because I love it; I carry a gun because I love life
and the people who make it meaningful to me.

Police protection is an oxymoron: Free citizens must protect
themselves  because
police do not protect you from crime; they just investigate the  crime
after it happens and then call someone in to clean up the mess.